


The reason why Thor never dated Sif

by Keenir



Series: Learning curve folder [4]
Category: Marvel (Movies), Norse Mythology, The Avengers, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Behold my abuse of Norse deity names, Future Fic, Gen, Odin's names, Please Do Not Take This Seriously, Sif Tyrsdottir, Sif's parentage, Yes this is crack and PWP, the ENTIRE point of this is for the punchline of names
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-11
Updated: 2013-08-11
Packaged: 2017-12-23 03:28:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/921459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Keenir/pseuds/Keenir
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I should perhaps have mentioned a few of my father's surnames," Thor said.<br/>Bruce's brain matched up the parts that sounded the same.  <i>It can't be that easy.</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	The reason why Thor never dated Sif

**Author's Note:**

> I think the lack of sleep is beginning to effect my brain.

"It is good to see you again, Banner," Thor said.

"Welcome back, your Majesty," Bruce said, wondering what occasion prompted this visit.

"Please. With you, my friend, I am Thor. Naught more than Thor."

Bruce shrugged. "Okay."

"Do you remember when I attacked Steve Rogers? Not when I had attempted to recover Loki - the occassion after that."

"I think so," Bruce said. _It started the two of you on a long long road of not quite trusting each other, even after all the rest of the team's grandkids had died of old age._ "You wouldn't explain what he'd said that pissed you off like that, and Steve didn't bother trying after you squeezed his throat when he tried repeating it."

Thor nodded and hurled Mjolnir into the deep distance, then sat down. Bruce joined him, feet dangling off the cliff. "Before I was banished to Earth, I was brash. _That_ Thor would have demanded an apology for what Steve said, would have roared disapproval and curses at him. Might have made him pay with his life."

_I don't think SHIELD would have been the only ones curious if Dr. Erskine's formula repaired decapitations._

"You knew that Loki was fostered in my House, then the House of Odin," Thor said.

Bruce nodded. "You said adopted, but I think we were all on edge at the time." _Particularly with_ how _you said it._

"Before he passed away, our father spoke of the true reason for fostering Loki - it was to build a bridge of peace between Asgard and..." Thor shook his head. "They are extinct now, Loki's race. Thanos has seen to that. I always had known that my brother was fostered. Sif knew as well, knew it before any of the three of us could spell it or pronounce it." Thor sighed. "How is Sif?" he inquired.

"Sif's...she's doing okay," Bruce said. 'She has a tacit understanding with the Other Guy' Bruce had once phrased it, 'she doesn't wake him up too often, and he doesn't pretend she's a frisbee.' Even now, this long after Loki's death, they didn't take comfort in one another - _more of being the shade tree for when the other needs to rest their head._

"I am glad. For she is part of why."

"She what?"

"Banner, do you know her name?" Thor asked.

"Sif Shieldmaiden, Armsbreaker, Regimentmaddener, Housecollapser, Gen-"

Thor, smiling, waved him down. "I mean only what passed for surnames in the era of your birth, Banner."

"Oh. Sif Tyrsdottir," Bruce said.

"Yes. As I am Thor Odinson."

Bruce waited.

"Steve suggested - asked, I grant - that I ask Sif on a date. It was not until later that I came to understand the differences in dating between his time period and the period in which he made the question. I took offense."

And Bruce waited.

"You do not see?"

"Afraid not. Sorry."

An idea occurred to Thor. "I should perhaps have mentioned a few of my father's surnames. Odin Allfather, the Hanged God, Hangatyr."

Bruce's brain matched up the parts that sounded the same. _It can't be that easy._ "Sif's your sister?"

"Half-sister," Thor said.

_Well. That certainly puts a new light on why you were so pissed at those mythology books too._

"Father's plans were to marry Sif to Loki, uniting our Realms."

"Would it have worked?" Bruce asked. _Not that I enjoy questioning gods, you understand, but it seems a little flimsy as plans go._

Thor nodded. "We put away our hostilities with Vanaheim when my grandfather arranged the marriage of my parents - Odin and Frigga of the Vanir." Thor shook his head, hair not as long as it once had been. "But then I invaded Jotunheim, and father collapsed, and so too did all the plans and hopes."

"And Loki ended up..."

"Yes," Thor said, his voice sad at the memory. Pulling himself out of that, he caught the returning Mjolnir, then said "There was another reason I came today."

_Ah, here we go._

"Your presence has been requested by name," Thor said. "By one who is older than my entire dynasty."

"So, not someone I want to say thanks but no thanks, then," Bruce said.

"That is so."

_Okay._ "I'll get Sif." _I have a feeling she'll want to take a part in this._


End file.
